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Musical inspiration:

i. I love you

"Under these circumstances, I fear accepting such an offer will result in detrimental results."

Scarlett stands her ground under that scrutinizing gaze. Feels it explore her facial features, sink low to examine the embroidered uniform she wears, then finally settle back on her face. She briefly wonders what he sees in her expression - it has been perfectly crafted to conceal any shred of emotion that might give way to her intentions. Pretty and unassuming at best. Vacant and hollow at worst. The silence between them drones long enough that Scarlett becomes aware of a clock ticking in the background. This man is most likely waiting on her to say something to convince him this contract will present plenty of benefits. However, she has been given no such orders to persuade the man's decision. The sect was confident Jasper would accept their peace offering in the form of an allied researcher.

-

The tour of the manor was pointedly restricted to several rooms. Scarlett heard the unspoken rule; you are only permitted in these areas. It is of no consequence to her that she is not to roam freely, this is merely familiar territory. Freedom was never a luxury afforded to a child soldier. They end the tour with a bedroom far more lavish than anything Scarlett has ever seen. Jasper tells her it will be her private quarters and apologizes for not having better amenities, but she is not listening because there is a window from which she can see the outside world. She steps toward it unthinkingly, soft hands skimming the wooden frame. Her breath fans across the glass when she leans in too close, obstructing her view. Jasper observes her strange behavior from the doorway. Before leaving, he announces that dinner will be ready soon, then closes the door. This will be the only time Jasper enters Scarlett's room; his first gift to her is a privacy she'd never been allowed previously.

Later that night, dinner is a silent affair. Several tools of cutlery lay on either side of Scarlett's plate, but she is most intrigued by the lack of a steak knife.

-

It takes three weeks for Scarlett to become proficient in detailing experiments correctly. Jasper no longer hovers over her shoulder or insists she only uses erasable writing tools, but she feels distinctly empty because of the lack of attention. He has his face pressed to a microscope and holds a syringe in a gloved hand. The muscles in his wrist flex and the experimental substance is injected into the specimen. Gentle, slow, and always so careful. "No immediate reaction observed." It smells nice beneath the chemical cleanliness. "Administring a higher dosage." She should be writing this down, she knows, but she feels petulant and disobedient. Acting as such would lead to punishment from the sect, but Scarlett is learning that she is no longer in the care of that place. She is in Jasper's care. And his hands are so gentle. So slow. And always so careful.

"You haven't written anything." He says when he finally notices her secret act of defiance. Scarlett's punishment is the return to the erasable tools and more scrutiny. She couldn't be happier.

ii. I love you

Morning light filters through the gap in the curtains, kissing Scarlett's bare shoulder flexed in a position that keeps her hand suspended. Lithe fingers dance along the planes of Jasper's sleeping features, not quite daring to touch. If he wakes and sees her, she fears finding regret filter through his gentle eyes. It is far beyond the time Jasper usually wakes, but she suspects it has something to do with all the wine they consumed the previous night. Humans are surprisingly delicate, she is learning. It is from this thought that Scarlett decides she will protect Jasper. Right now, however, she shifts closer to him and tucks her face into the crook of his neck.

So, this, she thinks, is what it feels like to love.

iii. I love you

"I'm pregnant with your child." Jasper is, predictably, shocked by this news. Silence follows. The ticking of the clock is louder than ever, only this time it feels like the countdown attached to a bomb living inside Scarlett's head. If it continues, she might flee through the door. She is no less thrilled by this turn of events than Jasper is, but the hesitation is killing her nonetheless. It isn't until she tastes blood that she realizes she's biting the inside of her cheek. Somebody takes a sharp breath, but she's not sure if it's herself, or somebody else. "Please say something," a voice says. Eventually, Jasper does speak, but Scarlett can't hear any of it. There is a fog building in her mind that obstructs her ability to consciously witness the scene unfolding before her. Nothing feels real. This cannot be real.

"Are you lying?" Scarlett later asks when she finds the woman in one of the many halls in the manor. She is startled by Scarlett and turns with a jump, hand on her racing heart. The dress she wears is obnoxiously beautiful, shifting with movement in delicate waves of lace and cloth. The woman laughs off the fright.

"What are you saying?"

This is not real, Scarlett thinks. "About the baby, are you lying?" She doubles down, her posture rigid and expression trained still. Unlike Scarlett, however, this woman is not a trained soldier so her expression betrays everything. Confusion twists her features as she tilts her head with an unreserved inquiry. "No?" She answers like it's a question but Scarlett knows she is telling the truth. A giddy smile stretches across Scarlett's face as she rushes over in glee. "Congratulations!" She cheers, arms circling around the woman and her layers of beautiful clothes. Still confused, the woman places her hesitant hands upon Scarlett's arms and pets them awkwardly. Drawing back, Scarlett looks at the woman, noting the dusting of pink around her blue eyes. With as much sincerity as she can muster, Scarlett whispers, "you would have been a wonderful mother."

"Would have..?"

The fall from the balcony makes her scream, ceasing with a sharp crack when she hits the floor below. In the silence, Scarlett hears the soft tick of a clock filling the room.