Team name: The Trifecta
Team members: Apollo, Holly, and Ripley
Which character will...
- Throw the first punch
Imagine, just for a moment, the competitiveness of Black Friday shoppers in our favorite Elder Vampire.
Apollo. Without a doubt.
Holly would if it was the last edition of a book.
- Steal all the bath bombs
*Everyone turns and looks at Apollo while he is in fact looking at the bath bombs*
One would assume Apollo because of his flamboyant personality.
But alas, it’s Ripley. The silent thief and closeted self-care aficionado as any villain is.
- Get trampled by the crowd
Holly has two left feet, the poor girl; she's also short so it's likely that the crowd hardly even saw her.
Apollo has likely thrown the first punch at the poor fool(s) that trampled over Holly.
Ripley is already snacking on chips he stole near the front entrance watching the scene unfold like his favorite drama.
- Purposely tip over someone else's cart
Ripley. He’s already bored shopping.
Holly would be horrified and more than likely try to run back to help said person. She would go as far as attempting to put their things back into the cart, too.
Apollo has likely ventured off to try to find his gifts for the two and doesn’t bear witness to it.
- Accidentally tip over someone else's cart
Because the girl can catch no break; whilst she's attempting to help pick up the cart for the other person, she likely backs up and trips someone elses' cart, too.
Ripley: *raises both eyebrows, amused*
- Runs over a child
Imagine this. This child has the very last Nintendo.
Both Apollo and Ripley want it.
This child is already getting on his nerves. Ripley will do it while holding back a snicker.
Apollo would bribe them. There’s no way a child is the match for an Elder vampire.
Holly's already got the first-aid kit out to help the kid.
- Get into a fight with their own team member
Holly would for the fact that Ripley continuously throws his miscellaneous things into the cart that they do not need and ruining the list Holly has for the trip in general.
Ripley enjoys rilling Holly up so he keeps it up while adding in the occasional quip.
Apollo will get into a fight with Ripley because he MUST defend Holly’s honor.
- Gets in line to sit on Santa's lap
Being a believer in higher powers, Holly would likely always have some fixation that a wish on a star, or a Christmas wish from a faux Santa might grant her some form of control of her life. So yes, depressingly, she would be in line to wish for an easier life.
Apollo is in line next to Holly, rocking back and forth on his feet like a giddy kid. Who is this Santa figure and what shall he wish for?
Ripley has been dragged to stand in line by Apollo and as such is throwing chips at Apollo between bites as revenge.
- Climb the shelves to get an item off the top shelf
Holly would do her damn best with attempting to get them herself–she'd climb them out of spite that she was able, yet still not be able to reach the item.
- Has to help the character above get items off the top shelf
Apollo is hovering behind her ready to catch her in case she falls and inevitably ends up helping her anyways.
Ripley has snuck off.
- Hijacks the intercom & makes a fake announcement
Apollo and it'll be an announcement drawing others across the store away from what he wants.
And to be frank, Holly wouldn't even be mad. Especially if it were to her advantage to grab something she really wanted.
- Waits in the car
Ripley wishes he was in the car and yet Apollo dragged him into the store.
- Be the extreme couponer at the checkout
While she isn't as bad as most, Holly would have the booklet of things that were on sale and throw out the coupons if she had the opportunity to use them. Likely for school supplies and food.
Ripley is looking at the coupons like they’re aliens. He truly has no idea what they are or what they are for.
Apollo is willing to just pay for everything to help take care of Holly. She keeps denying him.
- Pay with a jar of coins
Ripley’s evil tendencies are not done yet. He’ll pull out two jars of coins simply for the fun of it and to watch the shoppers behind them suffer while they take so long.
If the coins were the only things that Holly had, she would do so. Maybe not an entire jar, but she would have no shame paying what she needed in order to get by.
- Be the first to get fired if they worked at the store
Ripley would, just to prove a point that he could get a job at a store like that then be fired the fastest.
Apollo has never worked in a store and has no desire to ever do so.
Holly will take whatever job she could get that would fit her schedule with school and home life, but she would never attempt to be fired from it.
- Pepper sprays someone
She lives a life of constantly needing to look over her shoulder for personal reasons. She has no fear of striking if someone gets close to her. And if she has pepper spray, you best bet she's using it on the unlucky bastard who scared her badly.
Apollo: *hisses and flees* The smell is worse than garlic.
Ripley is laughing his ass off at the poor bastard being pepper sprayed. This is likely the first time he and Holly see eye-to-eye.
- Who shoplifts?
Ripley. By this point in their shopping trip he has already eaten two bags of chips and stolen a candy bar and likely more no one knows about. He has no plans to pay for any of it.
Apollo is none the wiser.
- Who starts playing Marco Polo
Apollo. He’s looking for Ripley. There’s a reason the spy is known as “The Ghost”.
But there’s a catch.
Ripley’s doesn’t speak. And you’ll likely find him laughing to himself while he hides somewhere in the store making Apollo frustrated. You’d think the vampire would learn by now…
Holly would say it nervously, but in the end, likely wound just call Apollo to find him faster. She's got deals to get to after all.
- Camps out at the store before opening time
Likely not at a store that anyone would suspect, but she would in order to get in life early for Santa. That, or she would do it if there was a rare signed copy of some occult book she really loved and would fight tooth and nail for.
Apollo needs his beauty sleep. He most certainly will not be camping.
Ripley is no where in sight and no one knows where he is.
- Most likely to shop in an inflatable T-Rex costume
The writer - Tylynnosaurus ;)
- Most likely to be the streaker
Apollo - probably after trying on an outfit in the changing room and needing to find a different size and/or Ripley has stolen Apollo’s clothes from the changing room while he looks for additional items.
- Goes to the 20-item or less line with two carts full of items
Listen, if the lane is open the lane is open. When you're trying to get out of there and every other lane is full, even a goody good like Holly would go to the smaller lanes in order to get out as soon as she could.
Ripley: *pulls out a shirt he has stolen from a rack that’s perfectly in Holly’s size and reads, Santa’s little rebel. - mockingly holds it up to her as they go into line*
Apollo: *elbows Ripley in the ribs*
- Steals CDs/discs/games and leaves the empty boxes on the shelf
Ripley. He has stored these in his own version of a mary poppins bag which he makes blink and out of existence at a whim.
Apollo has been lost in the records section instead.
- Get to checkout only to realize they HAVE to run back and get one more thing
Holly would have no shame. She'd also have no shame leaving one of the boys at the cart to make sure that they kept their place in line.
Ripley: *eye roll and throws a chip at Holly*
Apollo: *internally panics they’ll be at the store for far longer*
- Which character just needed groceries?
Ripley, but by the time their trip is done he’s already eaten everything he needed at the store. He’ll be content for a while yet.
Apollo has no need for groceries, but might buy some to appear mortal and normal. Low and behold at this stage in his life he still can’t put together a proper meal.
Holly probably needed them, yet didn't want to go on that day. But if she heard that Apollo was going, she would in order to help feel a bit more secure at the store.
- Who forgets their wallet?
Depending on the situation, she likely would ask someone *cough cough* Apollo *cough* to pay for it. She'd pay him back later though, even if he likely wouldn't let her.
Apollo would do it while she’s frantically searching, finally rejoicing that he got to take care of her in some way.
Ripley believes in the five-finger discount.
- Which character gets lost and ends up in the backrooms?
Probably looking for one of her obscure books she would somehow wander into there. If she makes it out is up for interpretation. You be the judge.
- Which member has the closest Karen haircut?
Apollo side-eyes Ripley while hiding his signature smirk.
Holly is the one showing a picture of 'the' Karen haircut.
Ripley glares and crushes the bag of chips in his hands.
- Which member has the most Karen personality
*Everyone stares at Apollo while he’s trying to get his way with an expired coupon for Holly.*
- Who's idea was it to go shopping to begin with?
Possibly Apollo. He'd be blushing trying to hide the fact he wanted to actually buy a gift for Holly when she won't give him the time of day at the moment. And Holly, ever the opportunist, would take up that option to join for the sake of being able to save time for studying.
- Who actually finished the shopping list?
Because dammit, even if she didn't plan on going, she would make a list of what she needed while they were driving there, and come hell or high water, she's finishing it.
And Apollo, but he’s fashionably late with all gifts just like this blog entry.
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